Quick DIY Tutorial for Those Who Aren't Particularly Crafty

I just wanted to quickly pop this up here, as I know some may find it helpful. I've started work on my nursery and, being of little money (and I mean very little), I decided to do everything on a budget. Which mostly means I get to make a mess and pretend I'm oh-so-crafty. Thus, I have painted the walls to match a theme which I hope isn't too girly or overly 'neutral' (which mostly means yellows and greys, apparently).

You'll need:
Some paint brushes (I picked up a set of 5 from eBay for £1.49)
Pencil (and sharpener)
Eraser
Brown paint (if you have an eye for detail you may like to get a few shades)
Green paint (as above)
Colours to match whatever theme your going for
Mayyybe some decals, to finish it off (mine were roughly £2 for a sheet of 30 butterflies, and I bought two lots of different colours, on eBay)


Step 1

Make sure your walls are clean and well-prepped.
If you have recently painted, wait for the walls to be thoroughly dry before making your move (I live in the UK, so it'll generally take roughly 2-3 weeks, usually).
If you aren't painting, or haven't painted recently, grab some sugar scrub from a DIY store, or online (roughly £2-£5 depending on where you go). This will help get rid of dust and general rubbish that may have built up on your walls over time- which is brilliant for sating that nesting appetite- and will help the mural your painting last longer. Always follow the instruction given on the bottle and keep the room well-ventilated!

Step 2
Grab your pencil and start drawing the outline- the easiest way I found was to move in one direction in a smooth motion. If you make a mistake, just go back to where the mistake started and continue as if nothing happened- you can erase mistakes later with either paint or an eraser so don't worry about them now.
Your tree will most likely differ depending on your drawing style. My particular drawing style is something I like to call 'clunky' (which is a nice way of sayin 'sh*t') and, if I had the intelligence to think ahead, I would have taken a picture at this point- but your general aim is for something along the lines of this:

Step 3:
Fill in your lovely outline with your brown paint (or paints, if you like to add the knots and boughs that trees naturally have- shockingly, I didn't) so it looks like the one above.
Now, let's all agree that the one above does look a little too Halloween-esque for a babies room at this moment in time. I was thinking about filling in that little hole with a darker brown/black and popping an owl in there but was concerned I might damage my child for life, so opted out.

Step 4:
Add your leaves! The easiest way to paint leaves (in my opinion) is to do two quick, short strokes of your brush, from the top of your leaf, outwards slightly and meeting at the bottom, in the middle. Don't worry if yours turn out a little fatter or longer than mine. I like to think of this as being something you have created organically for yourself and your kid- rather than see these as mistakes (because for some reason we always desperately strive for perfection), I like to think of these as 'adding personality'. Because sometimes I need to find a better way to describe my problems, or I'd go mental.
Your tree trunk + leaves should look something along the lines of this:

Awwwwww. Much prettier.

Now add a little grass to the bottom of your tree by doing short, sharp upstrokes with your green, around the base of your tree, so it doesn't look like it has popped up out of nowhere.

Step 4:
Go a little mental with your chosen colours and draw some purdy flowers to match your theme. My curtains and general decor is blue and purple, so I went along those lines. I also drew the very simple-looking daisy-shaped flowers, because I'm just terrible at drawing things in too much detail.

Step 5 (Optional):

Add your decals. These are brilliant little removable stickers that you can reapply until you decide what's 'just right' with you and they are wonderfully cheap. I'm going to be getting some other woodland creatures to add, as well. Y'know, foxes and other cute little buggers to look like they're playing around my tree but if you have a simpler theme, then your finished product should look something along the lines of this:

Step 6:

Stand back and let people admire how brilliant and talented you are. Yes, that's right. Look at how crafty you are. You're clearly going to be a brilliant mum.

What Pregnancy Has Taught Me Thus Far...

It has been ages since I wrote my last post and I felt that it was maybe time to give some a little more mature, sage advice. Obviously this is all personal to my experience but from what I gather, us ladies tend to have a crossover of opinions and emotions during pregnancy and, if I could be bothered to draw a Venn Diagram, I'm sure we'd all nod our heads in collective agreement over at least some of the things I've learnt from my first baby.

 Everybody has an opinion, whether you asked for it or not.

 When I first found out about my pregnancy, I was reluctant to tell anyone because I was always seen as a bit of a wanderer, in terms of where my life has been. Hence, the second anybody found out about me, I was instantly reminded about how I must 'grow up' now... by people who knew nothing more about me than what I was like as a teenager (and, if you've read my previous post, you'll know I was a grumpy-ass teen). The level of rudeness from others can never be underestimated, and you'll probably hear people who disagree with everything from your name choice to what nappies you were thinking of buying- and God help you if you bring up the matter of breastfeeding! Understandably, during a time when you're happy one minute and anxious as all Hell the next, this is not helpful and can raise your worry-levels to all-time-highs.

My Advice: For me, my pregnancy is a very personal thing. I haven't posted much about it on Facebook/Twitter, other than the original announcement and a pic of my bump around xmas-time. I talk to my other half about our little girl (yes, we found out on NYE that it's a very wriggly, bouncy baby girl at our anomaly scan) all the time but I no longer ask for opinions from anyone else unless I genuinely think they might have something valuable to input. I have, however, joined up to BabyCentre as I've found their app both informative (they have a page which gives you a day-to-day update of your baby, as well as things you should be preparing for) and the other members helpful (this may vary from board to board, on the forums but my group- May 2015- are a good mix of 'Feet-on-the-Grounds' and 'Head-in-the-Clouds', in terms of advice and counselling). This is effectively a great way of getting all the silly first time mum questions out of the way and also finding a support network that you don't need to be reserved around.

Everything is so damn expensive

Did you know that the general amount for a cheap nursery set is 500 quid. FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS?! Who even has that kind of cash lying around?! And that's just for a cot, wardrobe and changer. Sod. That. You'll suddenly find yourself desperately looking for sales, scouring eBay and hoping that people will be nice and help you buy at least some smaller bits and bobs

My Advice: Every shop these days has a baby event. Keep your eyes peeled and jump on them. Don't get snobby about buying thing second-hand (although there are a few essentials you will NEED to buy new, such as a mattress for the cot). Join groups such as Bargain Buys for Busy Mums who are on Facebook and have their own website (they have a lot of useless things on there but a few gems, too). Don't fall for every marketing ploy out there and check on the forums for recommendations from other mums- Aldi and ASDA make some of the most popular nappies around (often ranked more highly than pampers!) and are a fraction of the cost.

You will suddenly realise you know nothing about pregnancy, birth or babies

Suddenly you will find yourself asking questions that you've never thought about before. I think most women who are honest with themselves will know they have asked themselves whether they will be 'ok' after baby is born and how the whole carrying-a-small-person will affect them but very rarely do we found ourselves questioning whether water and cotton is best for nappy-changing or wet-wipes. And you will find yourself asking this, at some point. How much room do we need in a changing bag, really? What do I even carry in a changing bag? Will I be better off carrying baby in a sling, or buying a pram? Which pram is best for public transport/car journeys/long walks? And, of course, the all important 'how do I get people to not bombard me after I've given birth?' This obviously doesn't include those who claim to know everything, of course- whether they've had a baby or not (see previous point).

My Advice: Ask! It doesn't matter what people think of you! Even if it is a stupid question, it's a question that you don't know the answer to, and anyone who is a decent human being is not going to let you flounder around in a Sea of New Stuff. I figured out which pram I wanted by asking a stranger at the bus stop what pram she was using and how was she finding it? The woman was an absolute star- even demonstrating how the pram changed positions and telling me where I could find it cheaper! We then went on to have a 20 minute discussion- and incidentally both missed our bus- whereupon she gave me some great advice about not trying to get EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW (she'd spent loads on toys etc. only to discover that her wee one preferred everything she didn't have).  It's much more important that you get the answer than it is to not be embarrassed for 5 minutes while you gain the courage to ask someone who, at some point, had to find out the answer, themselves.

Strangers are lovely, after all

Call me crazy but I had to pop this in. Don't get me wrong, the general public are generally insane and total arseholes (years of working in customer service may have skewed my views a touch) but, for the most part, this changes when you're pregnant. You instantly have what I like to think of as a Sieve System. This basically means that those who are rude, arrogant etc. generally stay away- because those kind of people don't like to be around others who are likely to gain more attention than them (and, as awkward as it might be, pregnant ladies just get a lot of attention). Luckily, this means that those who are left are, generally speaking, the kind of people who will put others before themselves. People you've never met before will ask you how you're feeling/how far along as you/are you excited? And so on. If you're big enough to be showing, you will be offered seats and first dibs in public areas and, as previously mentioned, you will be given sound, helpful advice by those you have never met before.

My Advice: Enjoy it! Pregnancy is hard. Like, really hard. You are the only worker in a baby-creating factory and your shift is 24/7 with no breaks and no relief (what fun!). You're sick for the first 12 weeks, feeling baby kick for the next 14, then hugely uncomfortable until you pop. It's nice to have people smile at you for no reason and help you with little things you probably could have managed yourself. These are the people who help you to remain independent when, in any other case, you'd probably be sat at home wondering why nobody gives a damn. They are proof that you are bringing a little 'un into a world that is not as hopeless as it may have seemed before.

Baby comes first. In everything.

One of the first things I explained to Jeremy when I first found out about our unexpected little rascal was a simple truth. "From now on, it's Baby first. Then me. Then you". Now, I'm so incredibly lucky to be in a situation where I have had to put this into a hugely life-changing effect. But every decision I make from hereon-out is based entirely on what is best for my little girl. The simple fact is, if you are still in a position of wanting to do things your own way, at your own time, with just yourself in both action and reaction, then you are not ready to have a baby. It's a hard, important truth which I honestly find is often overlooked by people who seem to firmly believe that they can live the life they did, beforehand... with a baby. You won't just affect your newborn while pregnant and breastfeeding- your lifestyle will affect them when they're a couple of months old, 5 years or 18. This is not meant to scare anybody who is pregnant, or thinking about pregnancy. It's simply a reminder that having a baby is a lifelong commitment to somebody other than yourself- and one which you can't separate from. Oh- and the reason I come second over Daddy? I'm currently the biggest provider for baby. He was actually shocked when I said that, if worst came to worst during labour (I'm ever the optimist), I wanted him to do everything to save baby, rather than me.

My Advice: This is actually a good thing. Once you've realised what exactly you've committed to, and gotten over the anxieties of 'will I be good enough?' (hint: you will), you'll notice just how easy it is to think about what is best for baby. You can still enjoy your life and all the little treats and naughties you had before you decided to go for it- you'll just naturally ask yourself how that will affect everybody's life.

Your dreams will affect you.

We've all had that bad dream which has you waking up, certain that a close, loved one has betrayed you or gotten themselves into terrible danger. But, when you're pregnant, your lovely hormones play a game called 'what do you really fear?', and this manifests itself both in random moments of panic after your brain has suddenly spiralled into a negative cycle and in dreams (yup. Even when you're not conscious, it's all about the baby and your future). These will be personal to yourselves and your own most-dreaded scenarios but mine have consisted of everything from being totally alone, to having baby taken from me and not being able to find her, to losing my baby and having to give birth to her, stillborn (and yes, they're very graphic... and men wonder why we get so upset at the slightest thing!)

My Advice: Talk it over. If you're with a partner, then it would be natural to go to them first, but you should have a whole network of people with well-working ears. Your midwife should be your first port of call if you find that your fears are getting harder to ease, as she can refer you to proper counselling- or simply put your mind at ease with solid facts. Never be ashamed to ask for help.

You will change

If it wasn't obvious enough at this point, I should probably tell you now. Pregnancy is a life-changing, pivotal time in your life that will affect you (hopefully for the better). You will all have your own reasons as to why (some of you may have tried for years and finally been blessed with a sticky little bean, while others might have suddenly had this thrust upon you) but the most important point I'm trying to make is that this new, wonderful era of your life is about to begin and you will get to see how your lifestyle and decisions affect the little part of you that yourself and someone who has impacted your life have created together! How amazing is that?!

My Advice: Embrace it! Enjoy the moments when your fears are eased by a loved one, or a stranger tries to touch your bump (a weird moment, if ever there was one!), or how your horrible dreams mean you cuddle up to someone you love and tell them how much they mean to you- because you've been reminded of how much you need them, or would miss them if they weren't around. Smile when you feel baby kicking so hard that they actually make you jump and think about whether they'll be just as strong outside the womb (perhaps they'll be a future footballer?) and what kind of person they'll be.
Enjoy your new life, with a life you have created.

Review: bareMinerals Pretty Amazing Lipcolor

bareMinerals Strength (Vibrant Red), you can get this from most decent retailers, but I got mine from here

As someone who has had to suffer through more than her fair share of allergic reactions to makeup (A.K.A. Allergic contact cheilitis), I was pretty happy when I first heard about the bareMinerals brand. In fact, after taking home a tester from London's Clapham store a few years back, I'd say it's the only brand that I am currently happy to spend a decent amount of money on- hey, don't judge me, I work in retail!

The first thing you notice about this striking red is the sheer pigmentation- for what is described as an 'opaque' colour, it certainly gives you a statement look. Because of this, you find you don't need to keep going over your lips until you reach a good, even colour, so a little goes a long way (at least initially) and it doesn't feel too 'sticky'- unless you apply a lot. Which is silly.

On the downside, this stuff gets EVERYWHERE. It's the first time I've ever managed to somehow get lipstick on my teeth (I honestly don't know how), it came off on glasses and, yes, my boyfriend's face (although I actually did get a kick out of kissing him in random spots for a while before he realised). 


But hell, sometimes we can live with these things if it looks good enough for long enough- so I took the liberty of assuming you guys wanted to see how it actually looks. Bear in mind that in this photo, other than the Lipcolor itself, I am only wearing bareMinerals foundation (Fairly Light), Mascara (Curl and Lengthen) and eyeliner (Body Shop's Liquid Eyeliner in black)

Summary: This stuff is amazing if you're planning on looking like a doll all night. For those who plan on being living, human things, I would suggest perhaps some Lipcote or a good deal of blotting to make sure you don't literally paint the town red.

New Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Trailer

In case you missed it- the big news this week, thus far, in the film world is the new release of Michael Bay's latest film trailer- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Not surprisingly, it reveals that the first live-action take on the heroes in a half shell since 1993 hosts a ton of explosions and Megan Fox. Honestly, I'm not sure whether I'm too keen on the much more technologically minded bunch that they're now being portrayed as, since I'm of the seemingly unpopular opinion that the cartoonish features we know and love from the TV series and 2007's TMNT are actually pretty endearing to our Turtle friends. Although I have to admit, Shredder looks pretty badass.

Take a gander at the trailer below and let me know what you think!

High Street Highlights for Wedding Guests

You know you’re getting older when summer becomes less about festivals and exam results, and more about weddings. These days, weddings are becoming more extravagant, with each couple trying to out-do the next, with the main question being ‘how can we make this more memorable?’.

At the same time, the internet is becoming increasingly valuable as a research tool and with sites such as Pinterest- and the many, many blogs discussing how to save money on your Big Day- couples are also asking ‘how can we do this particular thing, but cheaper?’. Yet we still see the happy pair willing to spend thousands on clothes, when they try to save on everything else. Why do we do this? Is it really because the high street doesn't provide the same quality as the classic catwalk brands? Or is it simply the fact that we enjoy putting a name to beauty?

The guests are no different- often spending hundreds on the finest dresses to hug their newly, neatly trimmed figures to parade in front of friends and family. Because, let’s face it, when you believe you look good, you feel great and everyone has a much happier time when they’re confident enough to shake their booty on the dance floor, to cheesy Golden Oldies. With that said, I like to believe I'm a master of finding a bargain and, for me, the high street is where it’s at. So I've taken it upon myself to bring the simple elegance of wedding fashion to you, at a price that doesn't make your purse want to scream. 

Cream Stripe Midi Dress- A touch more daring than the usual, this dress is perfect for us petites as the vertical stripes lengthen the legs and also means the design is more eye-catching, without being too overdone- if you've ever had the joy of talking to a bride a couple of days before the wedding, you’ll know not to take attention away from Her Royal Highness. Trust me, you’ll know. This one rocks in at £35 which is a real steal.

 

Antonia Short Dress-  A beautiful little number that screams elegance in it’s simplicity. This dress is from Monsoon and is considerably more than our other choices at £119. It’s a little too formal to wear on most nights out, but if you’re heading to a wedding where you know the guests will make a lot of effort, this really would be perfect. It’s also a good length, allowing you to show those pins, as well as your waist.

 

 Beige Chiffon Maxi Dress- If you’re anything like me, with a tiny waist but massive hips, you know just how difficult it is to find something that balances out your body so it’s just right. Enter the maxi dress. The best thing about the maxi is how it covers up all the wobbly bits but still makes you feel confident and sexy. Chiffon is one of the more forgiving fabrics and you’ll be grateful for how light it is, if the wedding is in a hotter climate (or on a rare day of sunshine, if you’re in the UK). At £60 from River Island, it’s at just the right price for you to still feel relaxed about wearing it around food and alcohol.

I also realise there’s quite a few out there who aren’t big on the dresses and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that- the most beautiful person is one who feels beautiful! My personal prefence in this case is wearing a pair of light coloured trousers and a brightly colour wrap top. You can find these anywhere, from ASDA to Zara, so go and have some fun, out on the hunt!

Beyond: Two Souls Review

There are two things you need to know before I go into detail, here: First of all, I am a huge fan of both Heavy Rain and Fahrenheit. Secondly, when I found out that David Cage had not only cast Ellen Page and Willem Dafoe in the main roles, but was using their likeness and developing his marketing around them, I was deeply disappointed.

Not because they’re bad actors- on the contrary, they are excellent and deserving of the meaty roles provided here- but because, for me, gaming is about total suspension of disbelief, which is much harder to accomplish when a person’s status is thrown at you from the moment the game was announced. It irritates me when a film is marketed using big names to attract audiences- it puts me off a game entirely when it’s used in the same way.

On this occasion, I will hold my hands up and admit I was wrong in this belief, because all the actors in-game did their job remarkably well, with what I would describe as very few slip-ups, if you can call them that, none of which are really worthy of mentioning here and certainly none that could be described as their fault. Indeed, compared to the acting in Heavy Rain (complete with…interesting accents), we’re practically spoiled.

Unfortunately, the game surprised me a second time by being disappointingly average from a gameplay perspective.

From previous experience, I was expecting a couple of issues with the gameplay; the first one being what I would call ‘Cage Teeth’, where the mo-cap is so heavily relied upon that the teeth look oddly out of place when a character smiles- or shows any strong facial expression- making them look like they’re about the sneeze (have a Google, it’s hilarious). Another would be the walking around in circles to bring back  that DAMN PROMPT- something that is made all the more frustrating because, for some reason, the characters are unable to turn on the spot and increasingly damned by the new control function used in Beyond: Two Souls.

The controls are something that are truly introduced during ‘Welcome to the CIA’, which is one of the better chapters and a brilliant example of how a game’s story and tutorial can be combined to great effect. The basic concept is that there are no obvious directions for the player to follow, meaning that gamers are to infer what action is needed based on the movement of the character. This is a lovely theory but not one that could be used to great effect here, since there are often times when a character will look like they’re moving in one direction, when actually it turns out they were going the opposite way and the camera angle had distorted this. Or I was just unsure which appendage I was following- there were times I thought our dear Page was going to duck, when it turned out she was actually trying to block and vice-versa.

This is all part of David Cage’s plan to turn gaming into ‘interactive movies’ which, to be honest, I already kinda believed they were. I'm starting to get the idea that, if Cage likes making films so much, why doesn't he go and direct some films? His stories are brilliant, original and enticing, with enough explosions to appeal to the masses but in terms of the game? I kinda felt like I wasn't playing for the most part. In fact, during ‘The Hunted’ I decided to set my controller down for a while and see what difference it made- which was none. The movements were carried out a little more clumsily than if I had made an effort but the result was the same.

This leads me to my biggest qualm of the whole experience- the game isn't as fun as it could be because there’s absolutely no risk involved. Our main protagonist gets pretty beaten and bruised, but she seems pretty unhappy no matter which ending you get and there is such a lack of insight or development from supporting characters it’s pretty hard to feel anything whether you save them or not. In short, you never feel panicked or rushed, other than in ‘The Condenser’, when Jodie is being attacked by entities both in their own form and by possessing dead scientists- a moment that firmly places Two Souls into the ‘thriller’ genre and is guaranteed to wake you up, again.

I think I would mind this less if Beyond hadn't had so much potential. The most interactive parts of the story involve Aiden (who I thought for most of the game was called Ivan), who you can play as evil or passive. Don’t like someone? Possess them or choke them-It never seems to hold any repercussions! In fact, of all the characters, I think I like Aiden the most- probably because he doesn't talk, but actually gets things done. He’s closely followed by Stan in ‘Homeless’, who arguably shows the most humanity in the entire story- but seems to quickly be forgotten about, despite the fact that he’s the only guy who comes and visits you in hospital. Little rude of you, Jodie.

The non-linear narrative does nothing to serve the story, in fact it feels as though we’re missing vital parts of the plot. This is something that is enhanced by the odd combination of life-events. We have plenty of ‘why can’t I be like other kids?!’ moments and very few moments of actual development. I also felt that there were quite a few chapters that not only felt out of place, but almost entirely pointless- has anyone figured out why we have both ‘The Party’ and ‘Like Other Girls’ but only one chapter like ‘The Mission’?

The latter is truly the highlight of the game, for myself, arguably because you feel like you are actually contributing to the story. Aiden is put to good use and there’s an interesting turn of events, making this a pivotal chapter in the game. I'm also a big fan of having the option to sneak (or go in guns blazing, all-singing and dancing- a personal preference) so it felt nice to be given a little more free will, here. There were still some off-putting moments, however- like how Jodie suddenly develops a conscience, but not before taking a small child into the centre of a war zone- then telling him he needs to get somewhere safe.

I was also pretty perplexed by the position ‘The Embassy’ held in the story, since I felt that a chapter which showed Jodie’s place and importance in the CIA deserved to be a bit more central to the story- not shown at the beginning like some sort of teaser. Although, this could be the director’s reaction to criticisms of his earlier work in Heavy Rain, which took a while to get going, so it seems that story progression is still something that needs a little work from one of the most popular game creators in the world.

It’s true that these would all be unfair criticisms- if Beyond: Two Souls wasn't being sold for upwards of £40. Even AAA blockbusters on blu-ray don’t go for that much, so you really have to bring something special to the table when creating something for that selling price. I also feel that the game would have done so much better if the designer hadn't been trying so hard to match common cinema-seller techniques. The cinematics are beautiful, the graphics pretty decent (though that’s to be expected in the current generation of gaming) and the story wonderfully unique, if a little odd at times. The main problem here,I think, is that somewhere along the way, David Cage forgot his audience- and, that, dear readers, is how you lose two stars in a review from a keen gamer.